Many people have written this past week with troubles in relationships that have gone asunder in romantic and platonic ties. All of those who have reached out are struggling with the questions of, how do I move on and how do I forgive? This life path that we are walking finds us stumbling and falling, running and skipping, and sometimes having no energy at all. Each day provides us with the lessons of life that we have in some way connected to our lives to move us toward what we need to experience. This precisely means that we will have challenges and victories and most importantly, we are to endure them all with a sense of purpose and faith.
We are never alone in our journeys. We have access to wisdom in the spaciousness of our interior. We are born with a cellular highway of memories that can be used to heal and to help our current lifetime. There can be fears, deep painful emotions, and phobias that can be released by techniques such as Integrated Energy Therapy and Neuro Stress Release. We are powerful beings with extraordinary opportunities to achieve anything we want. Yet, there is still an individual process we need to complete so we can be clear channels of living in the light. This work consists of letting go of grudges, anger, guilt, control, and retaliation. The ingredient needed for this release which becomes a solvent is, forgiveness.
Forgiveness is many things for many people and the premise for forgiveness varies on our awareness toward our true self. Forgiveness is not about relieving guilt, shifting blame, or being a martyr. When things fall apart or what seems to be a mistake is made, then there is something inside that nudges us to shift blame and create a space for denial. This tactic may appear as an easier way to relieve pain but by not taking responsibility for our part in something we subconsciously created, we are hurting ourselves not the other. We are actually pushing away our greatest opportunity to grow when we anchor our need to be right instead of looking at how we might have been wrong or our part in being wronged. We can take on a false identity of being a victim, as the ego loves to make character changes quickly when it feels out of control. For forgiveness to have merit though it must come from the heart, not the mind.
So, what is forgiveness?
Forgiveness is a process of letting go of the attachment to any result or resolution to that which you are seeking forgiveness from. Forgiveness is an act of pure unconditional love. Forgiving is personal and must come from a place of balance and equanimity. Compassion, empathy and patience are also characteristics that form true forgiveness. There will be a time in our lives when experience has garnered us enough surface wisdom to realize that everyone is working at their own level of awareness. We will start to be an observer and not look with eyes of judgment. We will see what looks good and bad but with a different perspective, accepting things as they are, not just what we wish them to be.
When we have begun our process of self-actualization, forgiveness just comes naturally. Giving can be a type of thanksgiving; an honoring to ourselves that we are made with the Divine energy that created all life. We are able to recognize the pain as part of the process and a precursor to the expansion of being who we truly are. When we embody gratitude, we awaken to our individual truth and become fearless to the roads that turn crooked or look closed. We will swim with the currents and not try to tread on our own sense of needing to control or to be right. Forgiveness is a kind of understanding that we are all human and make the best decisions we can with the information or experience that we have at that time in our lives. We are only required, in universal law, to just do our best and be kind. Forgiveness relieves our body of stress and dis-ease.
We are not here to judge anyone’s actions but our own and that really isn’t a judgment, it is an acknowledgment and acceptance. This is why forgiveness must take place first within ourselves before we can truly forgive another’s actions. Usually what sparks tension and aggression is that we are denying a part of ourselves that mirrors the frustration. When we can take our mask off and remove all the make-up that keeps us from exposing our nakedness, we can allow ourselves to emerge and appear graceful in our challenges. Forgiveness keeps us in the now as we are not deliberating on how we may have been victimized. What keeps us flowing with this life is our ability to stay buoyant in even the choppiest waters. Forgiveness is one way we float instead of sink and lay dormant. We are given freewill to make change and say things in our lives that direct us to our next experience. To go without malice or judgment is our truest course of action. Remembering our infinite love connection through times of troubles with the addition of leaning on our faith, forgiveness does not seem like an option, it is the only way to move into the next moment. Start today by reaching out and practicing the art of letting go and forgiving, forever. Be well!